Texas lawmaker: Chinese Americans should change names so "Americans" can handle them

Nine years ago during a Canadian National Election, Betty Granger, a Winnipeg Canadian Alliance candidate voiced concern over an "Asian invasion" in British Columbia. She said,"Canadian students can't get into some of our university programs in Vancouver and Victoria" because of an influx of Asian students. When discussing an arrival of refugees from Hong Kong, she said "There was a realization that what was coming off these boats was not the best clientele you would want for this country."

Needless to say, she was asked to step down after a well deserved uproar from Canadians. Unfortunately though, these views still exist today. At least this Texas lawmaker was a little more subtle about her racism. She only suggested Chinese change their names, not leave the country.

"Rather than everyone here having to learn Chinese -- I understand it's a rather difficult language -- do you think that it would behoove you and your citizens to adopt a name that we could deal with more readily here?" Brown said.

找对象： Looking for a Partner (Lesson 21)

In the 1970's Mao Zedong exclaimed that "Women hold up half the sky." This mentality has certainly not been excepted in modern China.

Bi ru shuo, we read a story in class entitled "Looking for a Partner." It goes something like this:

小赵 ‘Xiao Zhao’ is looking for a wife but he has no luck finding one. The first group of women he tries to meet think he is fat. In the second instance, being fat is 没关系（no problem) but they instead want him to have a salary of more than 5000 RMB, a house that is in good condition and about 100 square meters. Unfortunately, Xiao Zhao cannot accomodate these women.

His friends then introduce him to this women who seems to be a good match. But after finding out she is a manager of a company, he decides he can't marry her. He says, "是个非常有能力的女强人” (she is a very capable, strong woman). This is a huge problem as she will be making the money and Xiao Zhao will have to do the housework. Xiao Zhao explains, "男人怎么能给老婆当用人呢？” (How can men be their wives' servants!) He then finds a woman on the internet and they fall in love.

Not only is it crazy how openly and casually the story focuses on appearance, salary and living condition, the sexism is rampant and accepted as normal.

After telling my roommate about this story, she told me that at birth, boys and girls are compared to two banks in China. For a boy, people say, 建设银行 (jian she yinhang - the construction bank) and for a girl people say, 找商银行 (looking for a business bank). In Shanghai, the man's parents provide housing for the newly weds and the man is supposed to make more money. Thus, the boy is the construction bank because his parents will have to 'build' him a house, while the girl just needs to go and look for a rich husband.

There is also a saying (I forget the Chinese) but they say there are three groups of people. Men, women and women professionals because women professionals will not find husbands. Men do not want to marry a woman who makes more money than him and women do not want to make more money. While this to a certain extent exists in the West, it is openly discussed in China.

SHOULD I STAY OR SHOULD I GO NOW!

So since I have last written there have been many adventures with my Shanghainese family.

Last week, Melody, the daughter, messaged me saying her parents thought we didn't study enough together and were upset:

• "Hi sara, how are you today? We get a problem. My parents are mad at me cause they judge us have no enough time to study, they dont think you are seriously needed for me. I think we should hav ea talk with them, and we should let them see our study, dont be worry i am on your side!"

This seriously upset me because she and her parents expect different things of me and I don't know who to please. So I took a bold step and called together a meeting so we would be on the same page. I used my limited Chinese to explain how I felt awkward, how they need to all be on the same page in order for me to help, 等。 It turns out they weren't upset with me at all. In fact, they thought I was a good influence on the daughter because I study Chinese and work whereas they feel she just plays video games and chats on QQ (Chinese MSN). The rest of the meeting was me listening to angry Shanghainese parents yelling about their daughter's lack of self motivation.

But even though they don't hate me, they aren't particularly nice to me. The shanghainese around the table is the worst. They know very well that if they spoke Chinese I could understand probably about 60 percent of what they were saying. They don't care if I understand. I am there to do a job, which is teach their daughter English. They are not there to include me in their conversations and life. I don't know if I can handle that. What frustrates me more is that in their advertisement, they wrote that I would help their daughter with English and they could help me with Chinese...baaaah

Anyway, I thought I would make an extra effort to be a part of their family and to help out. SOOO, I made them dinner tonight! I made Minestrone soup, asparagus and fried matzah (seeing how it is passover). It was all pretty tasty. On top of that, the dad made this amazing steamed fish and some sort of bean. Melody invited her grandfather and her best friend. It was lovely. While the Shanghainese at the table is getting to me, I can't expect them to change their daily habits and language for me. I'll just have to deal!

I'll keep you posted on whether I get the boot or not. Right now I think I'm in their good books. The question is, how much longer can I stick this out??

Glitz Galour: The New Age Chinese Wedding

Take an extravagant Western wedding - Roses, a big white dress and veil, tuxedos, a fancy hotel and a lavish dinner and mix it up with some Chinese characteristics and you get one hell of a show!

There was an announcer, a staged performance by the couple, a video slideshow of how they met and a number of games.



Tank, a classmate of mine from the 2007 Fudan-Queens exchange program got married last night. Him and his new wife, Ingrid are a great couple and I am so happy they invited me. While I found much of the ceremony and reception a little cheezy and over the top, I also found it quite beautiful. Even though it was a western style wedding, there were many Chinese aspects to it. For instance:

The beautiful couple!

• Attire: The couple changed four times throughout the night, ending in a suit and a beautiful red qipao.
• Gifts: It is a tradition to give the bride and groom cash in a red envelope. My family gave me a red envelope to give to the married couple.
  
• Sign in: According to Wikipedia, it is a tradition to have two people at the sign in table, one from the groom's side and one from the bride's side. My friend represented the groom's side and invited me to join her. Hope I didn't mess up the tradition by having three people at the table!
  
• Food: 10 course meal! It was fantastic. So much great Chinese food, including crab, shrimp, noodles....everything you shouldn't eat on passover. (I abstained expcept for the crab. Just had to try it!) The only one issue I had was the controversial serving of the traditional sharkfin soup...It doesn't even taste that good.
• Toasts: It is a tradition that the couple walks around to each table and the guests say a toast. The brides maid and best man are responsible for chugging back glasses of wine. They turn very red and get very drunk.
• Poses: Chinese people think of the most creative and awkward picture poses I have ever seen! Seeing all the posters of Tank and Ingrid was one of my highlights for sure!
• Celine Dion and Shania Twain's voices were heard several times throughout the night. A true sign that it was in fact a Chinese wedding.

• 

Amazing poses!

During the dinner, as I mentioned, they played lots of games. The main games were trivia questions about the newly weds. So there I was, sitting at the back of the room, eating my sharkfin soup with my newfound Fudan friends when I hear my English name being called out. They had 6 people on the stage and were asking us a trivia question. What I understood was "How long have....known....wedding." I assumed they were asking us how long we knew the couple for. So I started, "Tank was my classmate last year..." The whole crowd burst out laughing. They were asking us how long Tank and Ingrid knew each other before getting married. Anyway, I spent the rest of the time on stage completely silent while people around me were guessing. I still don't know how it happened but I ended up winning the trivia game without saying anything. I won this really weird doll in a bunny suit. Good times...



















My prize!

明日星城 SHANGHAI: THE FUTURE

I recently moved in with a Shanghainese family. The parents pay for my rent, my food and I, in exchange, hang out with their 23 year old graphic designer daughter (and speak English with her). Their apartment complex, 明日星城 (mingri xing cheng, or SHANGHAI: THE FUTURE) is pimped out. Not only is the complex called SHANGHAI: THE FUTURE, the architecture is insanely futuristic, there is a pool and gym and it houses (I am guessing) the upcoming upper middle class in Shanghai. Mingri xing cheng, built in the midst of 'Old Shanghai' where old, dilapidated houses and buildings reign, is a great symbol of the inequality in Shanghai and in China. (More pictures and commentary will follow after exploring the area more).




Anyway, the living situation, in theory, is a pretty sweet deal for me (aka. I live for this shit!). I thrive on meeting new people and experiencing new cultures. However, its been harder than I thought it would be...Even though I have spent a total of 9 months in Shanghai, I forgot to consider that both language and cultural barriers could ensue. This failed foresight has led to countless awkward situations.



Firstly, we set no rules, guidelines or made a contract before I moved in. They kept saying, 随便，随便！('suibian, suibian,' 'Whatever is ok!') A couple days after I moved in, the parents sat me down and in Chinese (without their daughter present) told me that we have no obligations to each other. If I want to leave I can leave, and if they aren't satisfied with me, they can kick me out. Talk about awkward! On top of that, they speak Shanghainese at the dinner table knowing I cant understand anything. (The daugther always tells them to speak putonghua (mandarin). I really feel unwanted and truly 'mafan' (bothersome) when they do that. Moreover, our lives and habits are SO different! They asked me before I moved in if I 'xiguan' Shanghai (which means, am I used to it). I kept saying yes, of course! But I thought they were talking about the food....The parents are extremely traditional and are not fans of my habits (going out late and coming home late). I have therefore been trying to change my life in order to appease them which means that my social life is currently in remission.

Lets see how much longer I can last! Keep you posted...

(Photographs courtesy of the internet)

Converse in China

Today I partook in a shooting for a converse ad. My classmate is in fashion and asked if anyone in class was interested in showing up to a bar in the middle of the day to listen to a concert while they shot an advertisement. I was super excited to listen to a Chinese band play. Unfortunately though the band didn't show up until later. Instead, we were given converse shoes and sweatshirts and we were told to dance around a bunch of models.

It wasn't as bad as I thought a shooting would be. They basically put on Le Tigre and Justice and told us to go nuts. A pleasant and energetic way to spend an afternoon in Shanghai.

Birthday in China: what kind texts can do...

Not a bad day. But because I was so scared of my host family hating me, I didnt do much. I went to my Chinese language class, did a presentation about local food movements in a Chinese middle school, saw their organic garden they started (unfortunately it is in a gravel pit so they won't be able to grow much) and then taught some English. I came home early tonight and my host mom made me 生日面 ('Shengri mian' or Birthday noodles), also known as longevity noodles. Chinese people eat noodles on their birthdays as long noodles are meant to symbolize a long life.

I met a random Chinese man at the organic garden today. He asked me for my number which is not that strange in China. Everyone asks for everyone's number all the time. Later in the evening I got the nicest text from him. I hadnt even told him it was my birthday and I have no idea why he wrote it. Here it is:

不管人生路上有几多风雨，朋友如伞， 伴你一路晴空！ 祝天天俞快！
Bu guan ren sheng lu sheng you ji duo feng yu, pengyou ru san, ban ni yi lu qing kong. zhu tian tian yu kuai!

No matter how many clouds and how much wind there is on your life path, friends are like your umbrella. They will accompany you into clear sky. Wishing you a happy day!